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Only one thing, Mark: sending a guy like me some videotape. So if some bears are into skinny guys, palestine WITD, how come you've been made to feel unwelcome at bear palestine venues? Because bear culture-a phrase I'm using under duress-has shown itself to be just as susceptible to the body-image fascism that its earliest adherents claimed to be rebelling against. Bear culture quickly moved from rejecting the notion that there should be one standard of gay male beauty-hairless, flat-tummied twinks-to enforcing its own monolithic standard of gay male beauty-fat-bellied, hair-covered bears. At best, the bears who go out of their way to make you feel unwelcome are mildly hypocritical; at worst, they're so insecure that they feel threatened by your skinny, hairless presence. So what do you do? You go to bear bars anyway, WITD, and shrug off whatever grief you get. Then you remind yourself that until bear bars came along, the big, hairy guys you like got tons of grief from the twink crowd that dominates most gay bars. |
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