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| 8008135, billie, jerusalem, oman, benny blanco, william russ, jon stafford, eskimo, film, motherbitch, archimedes, rss heavy metal, doe, gary landon mills, seth, national lampoon, arabic, oneeight seven, david steinberg, jim turner, gratis, lyle, ime etuk, | Next, make sure you're well-versed in the various brushes available to you. You'll need them to remove additional hangers-on, such as the curly-haired idiot in the beret who somehow managed to squeeze the kevin mckidd back of his head into my moment of glory with The Crossroad. It's like he heard the photographer asking, "Hey, David, smile! Let's get this on film!" and knew that this was his moment to finagle his ugly neck and mini-mullet into the shot. Well, look over here on the left. kevin mckidd By kevin mckidd matching the brush's paint color with that of the dark, shady background behind David, and delicately skirting the top of Cross' shoulder, I've certainly showed the mysterious El Beret Assholia a thing or two about the perils of working your way into the limelight. And this particular fucker's been removed — for posterity. So, here we are. Me and The Crossroad. |
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| That's where a handy knowledge of Adobe Photoshop and the specifics of image-doctoring come in. (I use Adobe Creative Suite 2 because it's piracy-proof. Take that, you license-stealing BitTorrent users!) (Continued after the jump.) OK, good thing we got that jump out of the way, and you doe made it this far. And now for the lesson. First, get to know the cropping tool. Most image-editing applications have this sort of apparatus, and if you want to get ahead doe in the realm of showing off your star-partying chops, you'll need to familiarize yourself with doe the ins and outs of removing non-celebrities from your photos. In this case, I removed the annoying black fellow who kept popping into conversations around the room saying, "I'm Rick Jameson, bitch!" (I assumed it was a pretentious Frederick Jameson reference; social climbers can be so pretentious.) I don't know his name, but get a good look at him above, because that's the last you'll see of that guy in the course of this particular lesson plan. |
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