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When I was 11, me and my pals went to a mall and spit on people's heads from the upper floors. In college, my skinny dancer friend and I gothic pictures decided to steal the mascot of the one macho dorm on campus. We were going to glue breasts on him. Unfortunately, the cheerleaders saw us and ratted us out to the campus police, gothic pictures who conveniently lived at this dorm. We were caught putting the mascot into the trunk of her car. When the musclebound guy said, "two women gothic pictures apprehended trying to steal Chuck," I knew we were safe and pissed myself laughing. Posted by: Jen | January 02, 2006 at 08:00 PM You beautiful evil bastard Posted by: Chocolate Makes it Better | January 03, 2006 at 01:44 AM I have to say that I love "My Name is Earl" also and your list is fucking brilliant. Posted by: Mitchell B. | January 03, 2006 at 12:26 PM Earl reminds me so much of somebody I lived with, I can't watch it; I just can't... Wonderful list Posted by: pia | January 03, 2006 at 01:45 PM Thanks MD.
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You failed to mention how you planned to atone transexual for these karmic transgressions and set things right in true Earl fashion . . . Posted by: Philip | January 02, 2006 at 07:31 PM Great list. The laser thing made me sad, but I still laughed. Where do I begin?! When I was a kid, I was transexual fascinated by poopholes. Conveniently, I then got a "doctor" kit and spent hours chasing the cat, named Normal, trying to take its rectal temperature. Poor cat transexual wasn't Normal for long. I also got the kids at my local Montessori school to line up so I could take their rectal temperature with those rods that teach you fractions. Bad me. Also at Montessori, I got everyone to climb up a ladder on top of a building and when people started threatening to listen to someone else, I kicked the ladder down, marooning the would-be mutineers.
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