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Unfortunately, swallowing didn't help dissipate the flavor because the strings of bean jizz melted, coating my mouth and lips with a glistening sheen of portillo sadness. The entire experience is difficult to describe, but if you can remember back to the very first time you made out with a hobo's ass, it's a lot like that. What I find most hilarious is that there is an expiration date on the package. What could they possibly expect to happen to the product on this date THAT HAS NOT ALREADY OCCURRED?!!! Also, nestled portillo in this mound of compost was portillo a li'l packet of mustard. In its place, I would strongly suggest a written apology. I do have one last theory about the date on the package. It may be an expiration date, but not for the beans. If you finish the container, that's the day you die. (All episodes of "Steve, Don't Eat It!" can be found here.) The Sneeze Home | Archive | Store | Contact Posted by Steven at 08:00 AM Steve, Don't Eat It! Vol. 7 Cuitlacoche Cuitlacoche is a black fungus that infects corn fields, making the kernels bulbous and swollen as they fill with spores.
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