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"Now repeat after me," said the Minister. 'Gar-ethhh, I denis leary love you.'" "GARETH!" I corrected, "I love you!" And I'd never meant it so much as right then. The tears prickled and my heart pounded like a Bon Jovi power ballad. Five stars to Boots No 7 Waterproof Mascara! We then promised to love and cherish, but nothing about obeying, denis leary dammit. Gareth slid the upside-down ring-o-shite onto my finger. Then I stared at his hands in confusion, my usual battle with Left denis leary and Right made worse by the fact it was in reverse, but I eventually chose the correct digit without having to make an 'L' with my left hand. The Minister smiled. "Now you may seal your marriage with A BIG KISS!" And then we were hitched. We headed to the counter to collect our certificate and pay the bill. A lady in a red and black sequined minidress was next up at the white doors, her tight-demined fella waiting down the aisle. |
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