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| confess, hip hop, fazed, wake, songs, pachanga, james gandolfini, suzanne shepherd, net comedy, matt dillon, | We are having films no drama on my birthday this year, films it's a time for me to spend with my friends. My thoughts could best be summed up in the first season of Scrubs, said by Carla, "I can tell by films the way you are talking to me, you are thinking with your dick, and you aren't looking to really get to know me". That's what needs to change, these passion filled relationships need to go into the past and I need to enter adulthood. I can't keep going through this same self-destructive pattern that takes 8 days out of my life then another 2 months to get back to where I was before the relationship. Putting effort into someone and not getting the same in return sucks, I have missed two months of the lives of my friends. These past 16 days, I can't even count the number of friends that have called me to tell me how happy they are that I am single again. I neglected them to give support to someone who didn't return that to me and now I am left in awe of reconnecting with people who really care about me. |
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| My real fault lies in giving men more than they could ever give me and that's what needs to change. fazed My Breakup Pattern: Day 1: I can't sleep, I miss everything about the person even though I may have disliked them for weeks before the breakup. Day 2: I become angry and fazed a little bitter about the worthlessness of the situation. I rant and rant to fazed anyone who will listen. Day 3: I stop caring about it all. My mind clears up and I blow off the whole thing. Day 4: I go on a man hiatus, I am not the rebounding type. The last time I rebounded was 3 years ago and it's not a healthy thing. It works for some people but not for me. The days vary but the pattern is always the same. In this case it took 8 days, 8 days of absolute misery and sadness to get over the whole thing. I drank alot, talked to friends, and started to notice relationships all around me. We are now on Day 8 of the man hiatus, which will last till after my birthday. I can't get involved with men till after my birthday. |
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