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| king arthur, andy ackerman, feature film comedy, sauce, jordanian, egypt, essay, funny links, david steinberg, bryan gordon, comedies & family ent., inviti, phillip nicoll, videos, cameron, pamie, arliss howard, reviews, 1979 in sports, sweet, arab, americanhistory x, susan vidler, | The bad news is, it's the most depressing movie ever. My Take: Oh, it's just your typical "Korean gangster marries Chinese girl he's never met, Korean gangster falls in love with Chinese girl, Chinese girl tragically dies" movie. The pacing is slow when — you don't see Failan (the Chinese girl) until an hour into the movie — but the characters are portrayed well when and no other movie will put you in a somber mood like this one. Except for maybe Para Para Sakura. Wasabi (2001) Synopsis: Badass French guy from when The Professional finds out he has a Japanese daughter. Hilarity ensues. My Take: Hmm... what's the best way to describe my feelings for this one? This time, the italics mean it's in French, not Mandarin. |
Best Mature Paysites
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| This would all be well and good, except she's the leading lady, and americanhistory x you realize halfway through the movie that you have to like her. And once you realize this, everyone bursts into song and dance. (Aaron bursts into song for the main musical number, filmed on a street in Shanghai at night. It looks like americanhistory x the dance cheography to Lionel Ritchie's "All Night Long," except they're dancing to a love ballad that Aaron is singing. Keep in mind that americanhistory x all Hong Kong love ballads have, like, 7 beats to a minute.) Ernie: Okay, this can't get any cheesier. (Aaron suddenly goes into a dance solo. A TAP DANCE solo.) Ernie: Okay, NOW this can't get any cheesier. (Aaron and friends suddenly start to Riverdance on automobiles. They FUCKING RIVERDANCE.) Ernie: That's it, I give up. (turns off DVD, tries to buy Zoloft online) Failan (2001) Synopsis: The good news is, the chick from "Para Para Sakura" is MUCH better in this movie. |
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