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| king arthur, andy ackerman, feature film comedy, sauce, jordanian, egypt, essay, funny links, david steinberg, bryan gordon, comedies & family ent., inviti, phillip nicoll, videos, cameron, pamie, arliss howard, reviews, 1979 in sports, sweet, arab, americanhistory x, susan vidler, | ERNIE: I just have a $5. I really do need to go and... RICARDO: You wanna know how my wife died? Maybe if I tell you the whole story and talk for 45 minutes, you'll understand my situation a bit more... (three weeks pass) RICARDO: Hey, man. confession My name is Ricardo. I know it's 3am, but can you help me out? My bitch of a wife just left me and... ERNIE: ... *sigh*. I don't have any money. RICARDO: ... ERNIE: Listen, I gotta go. Screaming skitzophrenic man: This man, who is screaming outside the window at this confession very moment, is the reason why I am posting this entry. He rides on his bicycle and screams obsenities at the top of his lungs. When the police is called, he gets quiet, and then when the police leave, he screams again. It's impossible to sleep with the window open or without earplugs. |
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| And he does, literally, run up to you. One time, Mike and I walked home from the record store up the street where he, I kid you not, jumped out of bushes to ask for a cigarrette. (Who the fuck jumps out of bushes nowadays?) "They're menthol," I say. "Hope you don't mind." He hesitates for a while, then agrees and walks away.Beggars can't be choosers, apparently. Ricardo: RICARDO: Hey, man. My name is Ricardo. I know it's 3am, but 1979 in sports can you help me out? All 1979 in sports I need is $20 — just 1979 in sports $20 — so I can get to the local church and get some help. My wife just died and I got this inheritance coming my way in a week... and I got this daughter... she's this rap artist who lives in LA... ERNIE: All I have is a $5. Here you go. RICARDO: Just a WEEK, man! All I gotta do is find a way to survive for another week, and then I got this inheritance thing going... and my daughter.. I got me here a headshot of her, you wanna see? She's going to make it big someday and... |
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