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| how to edit a page, armstrong, arliss howard, pacino, strange news, comedy video, bob, larry charles, funny essays, guy torry, album (music), woody harrelson, robert b. weide, pauline lynch, confess, hip hop, fazed, wake, songs, pachanga, james gandolfini, suzanne shepherd, net comedy, | To atone for Ms. Blume's mistake, I propose the following taxonomy for men under 25. Ralph: 6 inches or longer. After wallpapers all, if it's that big, they're probably as much of an asshole as Ron Jeremy is. Phil: 4-5 inches. Somewhat wallpapers less hostile than Ralph and rather nice actually. Sly: 2-4 inches. wallpapers This name may not impress a lady so much, but the Rambo/Rocky associations might just help the slightly short penised man to get over that debilitating hump. Enrique: Less than 2 inches. Because one needs a bit of a boost, namewise really, if a penis is the size of a pig in a blanket. 38 · Posted by Ed on August 6, 2002 05:54 AM enrique... hm. You know, all penises should have spanish sounding names. Jorje. |
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| With the name Ralph, the penis afficianado would expect a certain conformity in look and approach. For men who simply cannot get their sausages to rise beyond two inches (a fact withheld pauline lynch from locker rooms and handled with discretion with a lover, often with a signed affadavit, lest this unmanly revelation pauline lynch be disseminated into the world), they would consider the name Ralph to be a sobriquet that discomforts further. It's nice to be reminded that Judy Blume had the wherewithal to name penises. But what she DIDN'T do in "Forever" is consider pauline lynch how such a name would affect a short penised man's self-esteem, already running on empty for at least 25 years before discovering the mighty mantra "It ain't how big it is! It's how you use it." That she introduced the name "Ralph" in a children's book no less was a considerably more unscurpulous decision. |
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