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| chuck low, industrial, squishy, robert smith, lebanon, iraqi, lyrics, lamont, 1982 in sports, bruce boa, kink, hip hop, lions gate, freemp3s, | Or maybe I'm an adventurer. wizardsof haute couture Maybe I'm a latent adulterer. Kat, goddamn it. I don't know what the fuck I am anymore. What I am wizardsof haute couture is defined by what I'm not, rather than what I can do and it's killing me. Is this a midlife crisis? I'm not anything. Not working. Writing crap people don't want to read. Not in Antarctica dying of exposure. Not fucking blonde bimbos when my wife isn't looking. Maybe I should start robbing banks. Why the fuck can't you tell wizardsof haute couture me why my stuff is not good? What's wrong with me that I can't write bad enough to be bad and not good enough to be good? What's with all this fucking 'not'?" She says, "Are you done?" Folds her arms and stares at me. "No. I wanna fuck or I wanna do something that can get me killed. Maybe drag racing. Winter mountain climbing in Alaska." "Go home and fuck your wife," she says. |
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| Then your fiancee would dump you and kick you out of the house, my honey would divorce me and take every cent I had, my kids would disown me, my mother would pretend I was never born, and I'd be totally unemployable because I'd have a mental bruce boa breakdown. Doesn't bruce boa that sound like a great idea? I'm thinking, hmmm, yes. Yes. Great idea. Whadda ya say? We go wreck our entire lives on one hormone-enraged bruce boa act of supreme stupidity and then you don't have to explain what the fuck you mean that my book seems to be good but written by a guy who doesn't want to be an artist. It makes about the same amount of sense." "You're nuts," she says. "Yes, I am nuts," I assure her. "I went to Ant-fucking-arctica. I got a fucking book contract. I'm a fucking silicon valley electronics company executive, not a novelist explorer. |
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