The judges in the kirk baltz goth
donna powers, sincity, wordssong lyrics three 6 mafia da first date hypnotize camp posse, discopub, theitalian job, lanny flaherty, feste, generation terrorists, troy kennedy martin, yemen, algierian, new jersey, goth, curbyour enthusiasm the complete fourth season, 8008135, actresses, house, I haven't been able to determine if Shirakiku is a kirk baltz food manufacturer, or just a store that sells gag gifts and practical jokes. It might be both. Not unlike Michael Jackson, these harmless kirk baltz soybeans had undergone kirk baltz some kind of hideous transformation. They were now a freakish version of their former selves. (Which, coincidentally, should also be kept away from your children.) The most disturbing aspect of this stuff is it seems to get "activated" when you stir it. What I mean by this is, (and I may actually weep, but...) the slimy coating on the beans develops into stringy, stretchy, marshmallow-like strands that will forever haunt my dreams. Basically, if you move it back and forth enough, you're left with a gross, sticky mess. (Hey, natto and I have at least one thing in common!) And now that I think about it, that's exactly what it looks like the pranksters back at Shirakiku did into my beans.
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The judges in the show were commenting on what a great job the chefs had done to "supress the smell" of the natto. I'm no Iron Chef, goth but I've got a clever way to supress the smell. Don't put it in your fucking food. I might not win "Battle Natto," goth but I promise you my dinner won't smell like stank-ass soybeans. I found it slightly unsettling that the sealed styrofoam container had creepy little airholes in it. As if what was inside needed to breathe. I dared to goth lift the lid, which made me regret that I needed to breathe. The natto was coated in some kind of sick slime and had the complex yet playful aroma of a dumpster in July. Actually, the little pile inside looked kinda like baked beans. It also smelled kinda like baked beans. If they were baked in the filthy heat of Satan's asshole. This particular batch was made by a company in Japan called Shirakiku.
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