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libya, xanga, william fichtner, contests, myboyfriend is a twat, evil thatcher, eskimo, hip hop, commerciale, lebanese, But I said, "You're not tired! You have lice you foul beasts and I'm going to use this (metal) comb (...as has been repeatedly recommended) until I get all those stupid little monsters off your head!" Oh, surprise! Max had them too! After we got everything cleaned up Logan went to bed and phil bonyata I sat by the phil bonyata light of phil bonyata the christmas tree and drank about 1.5 too many vodka gimlets and also used way more than my fair share of our narcotics stash. The following morning I started my day by picking through my daughter's head looking for bugs to eat because at that point I'd become nothing but a common monkey. Unfortunately my diet was ruined when I found nits on her head and then, though I could have been coming off the acid trip from the night before, I saw another of THOSE FUCKING BUGS CRAWLING ACROSS HER MOTHER FUCKING SCALP! Then I wished I might die. But I didn't die. I called the pediatrician and asked what we should do now and she said, "You go to Costco and get yourself a jar of mayonnaise large enough you could dock your jet ski in it.
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You're thinking, 'Just float a check until the funds clear.' Ah, but you aren't a Stupid Fucking Summers like we are. We used our last check on Tuesday afternoon! Weeeeeeeeeee! So off I went to borrow money from my evil thatcher mother. I'll tell you, you haven't lived until you've borrowed money from your mother to pay for the LICE TREATMENT on your child's head. evil thatcher Things are so totally awesome here. But you just wait! Things are getting evil thatcher even more awesome! Tuesday night we stayed up until 12am vacuuming and changing sheets and vacuuming mattresses and at one point the children were crouching on the bathroom floor crying..."Oh...but we're tired....." (I am not kidding. They said that like some Dickens orphans.)
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