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Paddy’s day, that this would be the one where Fat Ted “Swimmer” Kennedy would finally find the keys to the Oldsmobile Express to Hell at the bottom of a bottle. As always, my pious hopes were brutally dashed against puff daddy the jagged rocks of puff daddy outrageous fortune. But I found a reason to dislike the Irish, and no day is ever wasted in which I find yet another group of people to be pissed of with, so it wasn’t a total waste. The bulk of Irish folks are concentrated in one corner of America. Of the 54 counties nationwide where the Irish are the largest ancestral group, 44 are in the Northeast. The three states where that also holds true are Delaware, New Hampshire and Massachusetts. That helps explain the inexplicable: how Ted Kennedy keeps his job. Now if somebody would get around to explaining how Drunken Ted gets to keep his pulse. No, we don’t really hate the Irish. If it weren’t for them, there’d be no Guiness and that alone makes up for at least 10 Chappaquiddick swimmers.
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